My Name is Mary Tjong A Tjoe – van der Veen. I am 42 years old, married to a wonderful man, Marco and a proud mom of 2 beautiful girls.
As a child I grew up in the United States, Belgium and The Netherlands, my father was a prof. soccer player and played in front of 30.000 people every game. He was a figure in the spotlight and from an early age on I decided that was a strange world to be in. It was also a world that brought me to many places at a very young age, meeting different people from very rich to very poor. I went to 16 different schools and moved 24 times. I always felt that I had no place in this world and would find my place listening to my heart that I felt had a direct connection with something I called God.
When I was 16 we moved back to The Netherlands and I have been living in the South of this country from then on. When I was 21 my mom was diagnosed with cancer at that time I was with my boyfriend who I married a few months later. She survived this and I found out he had alot of problems and was an alcoholic. So after spending 4 years with him I left. At that time I spend time to build a carrier and was a European Sales Manager, later Project Manager for a large company collecting data that goes into I-pods, GPS systems and flight systems. I was head of a department of all women and I realised that I could feel their issues and sense their problems. That got me interested in another field of work. I went back to school and studied Reflexology, a 4 year (hbo, that is our dutch master degree) course including medical classes, nutrition, counseling, becoming a therapist.
I fell in love with my husband Marco and we married in april of 1999. I was pregnant with twins and a month later our life turned. I lost both baby s due to medical faults in the hospital. I have described this in my weblog; the letter I wished Bruce Springsteen could read. From that time everything changed. I had already kept a diary and continued to do so. Instead of me writing towards my diary, one day I started writing the answers back as if a God was answering me. At that time I felt that it was something outside of me answering me back. It was a long road to heal but also the greatest experience of my life. It had opened an extra door and I felt emotions so much clearer and stronger. I could communicate with my twins, with God, with so much more than I had ever thought to be possible. I received many beautiful answers to why this happened, how to look at the larger picture and how this was not just my own experience but an experience for everyone involved. I saw the side of my twins, they had died as children before and were left on the streets and wanted this experience to die again so that they could experience it with grace and have a broader insight.. We helped them with this and in return we received a life with more grace and insights. All the messages and experiences I am now writing down in a book. Still the road was a long one.
My husband and I split up for a while and I fell into the hands of a man who manipulated my grief to an extent that I believed that he was the one for me because we had so much in common. This was not the case and in this process I found every aspect of myself. I had to free myself from seeing the butterfly yet still dealing with a caterpillar. That was an even harder process then losing my children, I had lost myself and had to get myself back. For the first time in life I saw what my qualities were and I did not like having them. I had to learn to put myself first, I always believed that unconditional love was the way but unconditional love cannot love conditional love without putting yourself first even if you see the outcome of the others wonderful colors, you have to realize that the reality of their path NOW is very much where they are. Cutting lose from this man was a hard road. Ending up in a police station in Holland because he could not not put me down and had made up a story about it which I had to defend. I stopped defending him and made a choice for me! Shortly after I lost my children I started listening to the Crimson Circle and this was at an early stage of the CC. It made me look at myself even more and realizing I was god also. The God I talked to all my life was me. My husband and I got back together and we now have 2 beautiful girls.
I have had a practice in The Netherlands for 11 years now and continue to listen to the Crimson Circle every month. I love to write, teach, give people a safe place to re-set themselves and I feel it is time for me to step into the world with my wisdom and story. I write quotes under Mary Mary. I have never been a religious person but somehow Mary is on my path. I thought of channeling her but my message is to be my own messenger. Combine that voice of God, Mary, whatever you may call it with mine.
My passion in life is the Jane and Tyo foundation, named after our twins, in which we help children in need and have a project called the warm blanket project. We give blankets rolled up with a big bow around it to fam. and children who need it. Who are not so fortunate or who just need a small gesture. We fill them with gift certificates, candy and a nice message because we know how good it is to have angels on our path. I am creating to expand this project because at this moment we are realizing this just from our savings. When you empower a child, you empower the world. I am working my book, want to continue working one on one with people and use my voice…….
Mary Mary
